TEAM CACHO

I took the time to create profiles for all of my teammates so I can whore out interesting facts about other people than myself.

GIANT JEFF

Notable Accomplishments completely unrelated to running a 5k:

-Once ate an entire family meal for of four.

-Also, eats slices of pizza like they are potato chips.

THE FULL NELSON

Notable Accomplishments:

-dates a white girl.

STEROYD FLOYD

Notable Accomplishments:

-Once stayed out past his bedtime, and snuck back home without getting in trouble.

-Carries the realest fake ID I've ever seen.

-Only person to ever have sex inside a High School Musical sleeping bag. Even if it was with himself.

AIR Jo-DEN

Notable Accomplishments:

-He is the only multi-lingual runner on the team. He's fluent in English and Vietnamese (orders PHO like a PRO), but his native language is Jibberish.

-Didn't ask Pikachu and Chimcar to take a picture with him. Pikachu and Chimcar asked Jordan to take a picture with them.

SUKA-DOODOO DREW

- Only person I know who can wear a Newsies outfit, cross his legs like a woman, hold a tea cup and saucer like its circa-1900, AND PULL IT OFF LOOKIN LIKE A STUD.

-Only person I know who has THROWN UP and SHAT at the exact same time. I call it the suka-doodoo special.

-Threw away a promising basketball and football career for a promising fantasy basketball and football career.

-Pick him first for a pickup basketball or football game and he will be the best player on the court/field for three plays, then go home early to throw up in his toilet.

It’s You Got Served, IN REAL LIFE!

I have the feeling that any real dance team would kick my ass for comparing them to Marques Houston and Omarion’s ridiculous, over-hyped, over-dramatic, pathetically acted out movie, You Got Served!, which sadly, I still enjoyed nonetheless.

Luckily, former fat fuck Randy Jackson, of American Idol fame, is premiering his new show on MTV later tonight, called, America’s Best Dance Crew!, which seems much more convincing.

I actually never watch MTV for the most part, BUT, A.C. Slater is master of ceremonies AND, San Diego is being represented by the group JabbaWockeeZ, and UCI by Kaba Modern. While I’ve seen Kaba Modern perform a few times, I’ve honestly never heard of jabbawockeez until watching them in the audition episode, which pissed off my friend Jordan quite a bit. Shit, I couldn’t even pronounce their name at first. JabbaJabba? Jabba the Hut?

While I don't know jack-shit about choreography, I thought they looked good.




Confession: In spite of the the San Diego and Orange County connections, I’m actually rooting for another west coast team… FYSH N CHICKS. Yes, it’s fucking sad. Don’t’ get me wrong though, it’d be nice to see either Jabba and Kaba advance in the series, but I have my non-gay reasons for rooting for an all-feminist team who refuse to wear revealing apparel and instead wear baggy clothing to cover up… go figure.

Namely, I have a crush on one the dancers… KOI FISH!

Yeah don’t hate. I’m rooting for her tonight as well. Just watch when she is introducted (00:36 mark), and you’ll be in like too, guaran-fuckin-teed.

Behold!


“SHE’S YAPANESE!” Falls in love, the end.

Ohh Mahh Gahhh

So to bring the readers out of the madness of the previous few posts, here's this.

This my friends is the almight PIZOOKIE, the seemingly unavoidable dessert at BJ's (or as Jordan likes to call it, B and J's) Restaurant in San Diego. I came across this photo while working on one of my projects, and after seeing it I was left with my mind collapsed and stomach aching for food. That got me thinking about food in Boston. Everywhere you go, you can easily find one of three things; a dunkin donuts, a pizza place, or a sandwich shop. The fast food market consists of McDonalds and Wendy's (and Burger King I guess, but that's not even worth mentioning), and for those eager to make a fat dent in their bank accounts, there's a huge assortment of touristy fine dining restaurants. After a year in Boston, I've found a few special gems that I enjoy. Viet sandwiches and pho in Chinatown, falafel and hummus sandwiches at Falafel King or Cafe Jaffa, cheap indian lunch buffets, and a couple pizza shops that really excel at their craft. But in the end, nothing compares to the addictive and almighty Carne Asada Chips. Nothing compares to the deep dish goodness of BJs and their mouth watering Pizookie. Nothing even really compares to the simplicity and tastiness that is In n Out. So if anyone is wondering why I eat out so much when I'm in San Diego, the reason is simple. It's because good food that you grow up eating is so hard to come by (try finding lumpia in a city dominated by fat, wing eating patriots/red sox fans), so take advantage of everything in your home town because when you move away you'll end up like me, making ridiculous blog posts about food when I should be studying or something.

JUST STAY NO... TO D.A.R.E!!

The D.A.R.E. program is pathetic.



Holy shit, that lion is just plain gay.

With finals coming up and finding myself living nocturnally this week and taking frequent smoke breaks to supposedly "ease" all the stress, its come to my attention that the D.A.R.E. program is simply a joke. Save for those strong willed individuals who’ve resisted temptation for this long, I’m pretty damn sure everyone in my 5th grade class has succumbed to some sort of addicting drug by now, whether it be trying alch, grits, bud, crack, caffeine, w/e. Unfortunately for me, I’ve found a bad habit in smoking cigarettes. (Don’t worry I’m quitting soon.)

What’s even more ridiculous – correct me if I’m wrong - but I remember signing some contract/agreement bullshit laying out the terms that I, Adonis, WILL NEVER DO DRUGS. the fuck… HAH, that worked out just fine.

My homie Jordan enjoys rocking his 5th grade D.A.R.E. t-shirt every now and then, which got me thinking on how this worthless program can be improved, even with a complete overhaul in philosophy. Besides, if the program cant even prevent drug abuse for happy little kids growing up in Sunni PQ, imagine how pathetic it probably is at a school like GOMPERS. What a shame.

Rather, my theory is to make the program’s content more reasonable and focus on things that are much more practical to kids. Who cares about health issues, cancer, black lungs, advanced aging, or showing videos of old women with holes in their throats anyway? Lets not scare the kids damnit, D.A.R.E. needs to keep it real. Let us take cigarettes for example; fuck lung cancer, here are a few things that Officer Bill fails to mention when teaching his class of future druggies.

So buddy, you think smoking cigarettes is cool?
Smoking is bad because:
1. The stress of not having cigarettes.
2. The stress of not having a lighter to smoke your cigarettes.
3. The stress of not having both a cigarette to smoke and a lighter handy, forcing you to bum.
4. Bumming makes you a scrub.
5. You stink.
6. You attempt to cover up your stinkiness in a shower of AXE, only making you stink even more.
7. You can start a wildfire, those really suck.
8. Random gag reflex also sucks.
9. When smoking, your light sometimes burns out but you don’t notice and continue to take a hit anyway, resulting in a disgusting cold-draft that makes you want to yak.
10. You’ll sometimes have nasty shits. (Coffee & Grits, aka the Breakfast of Champions = dunzo)

I’m pretty sure there are other nuisances, but nevertheless, I am a firm believer that a similar list and the possibility of having nasty shits will discourage kids moreso than mentioning mere lung cancer.

Best,
Adonis